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नर्क में एक जगह पर बहुत सारे लोग इकट्ठा बैठ कर हंसी-मजाक कर रहे थे


नर्क  में  एक  जगह  पर  बहुत  सारे  लोग  इकट्ठा  बैठ  कर
हंसी-मजाक  कर  रहे  थे। 

�� �� �� �� �� ��

उनके  शोरगुल  से
यमराज  डिस्टर्ब  हो  रहे  थे ����

जब  काफी  देर  तक  शोरगुल  जारी  रहा  ��
तो  यमराज  ने  चित्रगुप्त  को  बुलाया  और  बोले,  ��

"ये  कौन  लोग  हैं  जो  नर्क  में भी इतने मज़े कर रहे हैं..?

����  " चित्रगुप्त   मायूस  होते  हुए  बोले,

"सर  ये  सब" punjabi" हैं, 
ये  कंही  भी  सेट  हो  जाते  हैं..!!��������������������

aab news Sunday, 2 August 2015
Akbar aur Birbal Non veg dirty funny jokes in hindi

Akbar aur Birbal

new Akbar birbal - Ek Baar Akbar Ne Birbal Ko Aadesh Diya

A: Ek Aisa Aadmi Dhundh Ke Lao Jo Mere Saath Isharo Mein Baat Kar Sake, Main Us Se Kuch Sawaal Puchunga

B: Ji, Maharaj

A: Agar Usne Galat Jawab Diya To Uski Gardan Kat Di Jayegi, Aisa Aadmi Nai Dhund Sake To Tumhari Gardan Kaat Dunga

Ab Birbal Ki Fat Gayi, Kahan Se Laye Aisa Aadmi Dhund Ke,

10 Din Baad Ek Bakri Charane Wala Mil Gaya Naam Tha Chanki

Birbal Ne Chanki Ko Lalach Diya: Main Tujhe 10,000 Rupaye Dunga, Tu Bas Raja Ke Samne Chal Pad Aur Isharo Mein Baat Kar

C: Agar Main Jawab Na De Paaya To?

B: Jo Hoga Dekha Jayega, Tu Mar Bhi Gaya To Kam Se Kam Tere Ghar Wale Mere Diye Rupayo Se Aram Se Zindagi To Kaat Lenge

Chanki Ko Baat Samajh Mein Aa Gayi Aur Pahunch Gaya Darbar Mein

Akbar Ne Use 1 Ungali Dikhayi, Chanki Ne Usko 2 Dikha Di

Akbar Ne Isharo Se Pucha: Kyu?

Chanki Ne Ek Ungli Asmaan Ki Taraf Kari Aur Fir Badshaah Ki Taraf Kar Di

Akbar Muskuraya Aur Usne Apne Haath Ko Hawa Mein Hilaya Aur Pucha: Kyu?

Chanki Ne Apni Pant Niche Ki Aur Lund Pakad Ke Raja Ke Samne Hila Diya,

Birbal Ki Ye Dekh Ke Gaand Fat Gayi Par Raja Bahut Khush Hua Aur Chanki Ko Inaam Deke Vida Kiya

Uske Jane Ke Baad Birbal Ne Hairan Hokar Akbar Se Puchha

B: Hajoor Ye Kya Chal Raha Tha

A: Maine Use 1 Ungli Dikha Ke Pucha, Kya Allah Ek Hai? Wo Bola 2 Hain, Ek Upar Or Ek Niche Aap

B: Ohh, Fir Kya Pucha Tha Aapne?

A: Maine Puchha Tha, Ye Population Kyo Badh Rahi Hai, Usne Lund Dikha Ke Bola Ki Iski Wajah Se

Birbal Ke Ye Sun Ke Hosh Ud Gaye Ki Us Se Bhi Akalmand Koi Hai Is Duniya Mein, Usne Socha Ki Milna Chahiye Chanki Se, To Ja Pahuncha Chanki Ke Ghar

B: Tumhe Samajh Kaise Aya Ke Raja Puchna Kya Chahta Hai?

C: Lo Ismein Kya Mushkil Hai, Raja Bola 1 Bakri Dega, Maine Bola 2 Lelo, Upar Wale Ne Bahut De Rakhi Hain

B: Aur Dusri Baar?

C: Fir Akbar Ne Pucha Tha Sab Bakri Dega? Maine Bola Loda Lele Mera

Birbal Behosh Ho Gaya

Moral: Ek Chutiya Tab Tak Samajhdar Dikhta Hai Jab Tak Wo Muh Na Khole??????

aab news
jokes santa banta | On 60th Birthday
Santa: Mere Pass Gaddi Hai, Banglow Hai, Paisa Hai.
Tumhare Paas Kya Hai?

Banta: Mere Pass Bhi Gaddi Hai, Banglow Hai, Paisa Hai.
.
.
Santa: To Saaley Apni Maa Kiske Paas Hai?

1 Aadmi Santa ki Betay Se Puchhta Hai:
Beta Papa Ghar Main Hain?

Santa Ka Beta Sprite Pete Huye
Uncle Seedha Bolo Mummy Se Milna Hai.

Seedhi Baat No Bakwas. :-)

Santa On 60th Birthday:
Banta: Ye Cake Pe Bulb Q Lagaya Hai?
Santa: 60 Candles Lagane Me Mushkil Ho Rahi Thi.
.
.
Isliye 60 Watt k Bulb Laga Diya.

Santa: Mobile me kuch MP3 Songs Load karwana hai.

Servicing Man: Memory card hai?

Santa: Nahi! Ration Card chalega kya?

aab news Wednesday, 25 March 2015
jokes santa banta | in Examination Hall
Sardar: in my dreams rats play football every night.
DR: take this tablet you will be ok.
Sardar: Can I take tomorrow, tonight is final game.

Inspector 2 Santa:
Phansi Se Pehly, Bata Teri Aakhri
Khwahish Kia Ha?
Santa:Mery Pair Uper Or Sir Neechy kr
K Phansi De Do-:)

Santa and Banta in Examination Hall:
Santa: Exam Sheet pe Starting main kya likh Don?

Banta: "Is Answer Sheet Pe jo bhi likha hoga Wo kisi Ques aur Teacher aur School se related nahin hain And ye sub imiginary aur iska ksi se koi Sarokar Nahin Hai"

Santa k Ghar NAVJOT SINGH SIDDHU ki Tasvir Lagi hui Thi.
Banta: Ye Kyon Laga Rakhi Hai?
Santa: LAUGHING BUDDHA Lene Gaya Tha.
Dukandar ne Kaha Ye LATEST Hai. :-)

Santa to Banta: I have One Good News One Bad News.
Good News is That:Meri biwi ka ACCEDENT ho gaya.
Banta: Aur Bad News?
Santa: Woh ek SAPNA tha. :-(

Santa Aur Banta Ne Zindagi Mai Pehli Baar Rickshaw Dekha.
Santa: Dekho Kitna Chhota Tanga.
Banta: Haan!
Aur Gadha to Dekho,
Aadmi Jaisa Dikhta Hai. :-)

aab news
santa banta jokes | Blood Bank lutya gya
Santa-Oye!what R U doing?
Banta-Recording this babys voice.
Santa-Why?
Banta- When he grows up, I shall ask him what he meant by this..

Santa Ne Jalte Hue Makan Se 6 Logo Ko Apni Jaan Pe Khelkar Bahar Nikala
Fir Bhi Usko Jail Ho Gayi

Kyun...


Kyun..Ki Vo Sab Firebrigade Wale The..

Gang of SARDARS broke a Bank.
Instead of cash they found Botles full of Chilled Red Wine,
Happily they drank & went away.


Next day Headline aai: Blood Bank lutya gya.

A teacher asked her class for sentences using the word "beans"..
"My father grows beans," said one student.

"My father cooks beans," said another.


Then a Little Santa spoke up: "We are all human beans."

Sardarji: Me E-Mail bnana hu. Sardar, Sardarg, Sardar123, Sardarabc Koi bhi nhe mil rha.


Sardarji Friend : Tum "Akalmand_Sardar" try kro 100% mil jye ga.

Santa was riding on a horse,
He jumped the red light & a cop whistles'
Santa lifts the tail of horse & says,

"Le Karle Number Note"..

aab news
santa banta jokes | Ghar mai Mera he Hukam chalta hai
SardarJi: Ghar mai Mera he Hukam chalta hai.
Mai Kehta hon, Garam paani le aao, woh le aati hai,

Dost: Garam pani Q?


Sardar: Garam pani se Bartan Achay Dhultay hain.

Santa k 12 bachon mein 1 alag dikhta tha:
Jab uski biwi marnay wali thi to Santa ne poocha: Ab to bata do ye kis ka hai?
Santa : sirf yehi apka bacha hai.

A lady asked Santa: LIPTON di chah hai?
Santa replied: Mainu ta nahi hai ji, tainu hai ta lipat ja...!

A MAN TO SANTA-- UR FRND IS KISSING UR WIFE IN UR HOME,
HE RUSHES TO HIS HOME
AND COME WITH IN HALF AN HOUR N
SLAPPED TAT MAN N SAID--
HE WAS NOT MY FRND..

Santa ki ladai apne baap se ho gayi
To usne apne baap ki photo kabristan me 1 ped pe latka diya
Aur Niche Likha
"COMING SOON

aab news
santa banta jokes | Yar iska matlab kya hota hai
Banta Singh: "Yaar Santa,
Last Year The Name-Plate Outside ur House Read Santa Singh B.A.
This Year It Read Santa Singh M.A.,
Wen Did u Finish urs Masters Degree?
Santa Singh: "You Don''t Understand.
Last Year My Wife Died,
I Put B.A. To Indicate Bachelor Again.
Den I Took A Second Wife, So M.A. Is Married Again

Santa In a Plane
Feels Vomiting & ask 4 a
Vomit Bag, Air Hostess
Gives Him The Bag After
Few Minutes When She
Comes Back Evry1 Was
Vomiting Except Sardar g
She Was Surprisd & Askd
"Santa g In Sab ko Kia Hua?"
Santa: "Me Ulti Kiti Ena Lokan
Nu Buri Lagi Te Me Wapis Pee Gya ... "


Santa:- Yar iska matlab kya hota hai, "I AM GOING"?
FRIEND:- Main jaa raha hun.
Santa :- Saaley, aise kaise jayega, 20 aur bhi aise ja chuke hain....answer bata ke jaa..

aab news
santa banta jokes | Woh ladki kitni sundar hai!
Santa ke ghar Ladki ne janam liya..
Banta: jab ladki badi hogi to ladke ise chedenge.
Santa: Maine iska intejaam kar liye hai.
Banta: kya kiya?
Santa: Ladki ka naam DIDI rakh diya hai..............Jokes in Hindi Santa Banta

Santa apni biwi k office gaya
to usne dekha k uski biwi
boss ki godi me baithi dictation le rahi thi.

Santa:- Chal LAajo, aisi jagah kaam nahi karna
jahan staff k liye kursi bhi na ho

Santa: Woh ladki kitni sundar hai!
Banta: Mujhe uska naam pata hai.

Santa: Kyaa..

Banta: Woh bank mein kaam karti hai, uske counter ke upar uska naam likha tha "CHAALU KHAATA"

Sardar Apne Ghar Ka
Darwaza Kandhe Pe Utha
Kr Ja Raha Tha ..
Kisi Ne Poocha
Sardar g Kithy Ja Rhy Ho ???
Sardar g Ne Kaha:
Tala Khulwane ...
Santa Ek Baraf Ka Tukda Utha Kar Use Gaur Se Dekh Raha Tha.

Banta- Kya Dekh Rahe He??

Santa- Dekh Raha Hu Ye Leak Kaha Se Ho Raha He!!

aab news
santa banta jokes | Train me raat bhar nind nhi ayi
Santa - My wife died yesterday..
Im trying to cry but tears are not come out,
what to do?
Banta - No Problem.
Just Imagine she Came Back.

Santa:Train me raat bhar nind nhi ayi,
upr ki seat mili thi, garmi bahut thi.
Banta:To xchnge krna tha
Santa:Kisse krta?
Niche ki seat pe koi aya hi nahi.

Banta: Yeh chaku kyu ubal rahe ho?
Santa: Suicide karne ke liye
Banta: To phir ubalne kui kya zarurat hai?
Santa: Kahin infection na ho jaye.

Santa: Look a thief has entered our kitchen
and he is eating the cake I made.
Banta: Whom should I call now,
Police or Ambulance?

Banta ped pe chada to upr baithey
Bandar ne poocha: Upr kyu aya?
Banta: Apple khane.
Bandar: Yeh to aam ka ped hai.
Banta: Pata hai, Apple sath laya hu.

All sorts of best santa banta jokes for your mobile. Santa Banta Jokes in Hindi, free santa banta jokes in hindi to read and share absolutely free for personal use only.

aab news
santa banta jokes in hindi | Coffee thandi ho Jaye gi
Santa at an Art Gallery: I suppose this horrible looking thing is what you call Modern art?
Art dealer: I beg your pardon sir, that's a mirror!

Santa had a dream in which someone murdered him. Next day he closed his bank account. Know why?
Because the bank's slogan was: We make your dreams come true...

santa in Coffee shop wth wife.
santar:Jldi Pi, Coffee thandi ho Jaye gi.
Wife:ki frk painda hai?
Srdar: Bywakof Rate List dekh
Hot coffee Rs.15
Cold coffee.45

Srdar got new job:
1st day he spent 11 hours on computer:
Boss was happy & asked what he did?
Sardar replied: Keybord te ABC agy pichy lagi c, O sidi kiti ae.

Train Chali, Santa 1 Dibbe Mai Char Gaye..
TT Bola: Kyun Paa Ji, Nazar Nhe Aate, Ye Ladies Ka
Dibba Hai.
Santa Ji: Sorry Ji, Mere Ko Laga Aap Mard Ho.

aab news
santa Banta jokes in hindi | Santa went to battery shop
Santa went to battery shop n asked to change battery.
The shopkeep! er asked: Exide laga du?
Santa: Dusri side tera baap lagayega kya?

Santa invested 2 Lakhs in a business and suffered huge Losses.
Do u know what the business was?
He opened a Saloon in Punjab!

Santa was standing below a tube light with mouth wide open.........WHY?
Because his doctor advised him "Today's dinner should be light".

Professor Banta asked a plumber to come to his college.
U know why?
Because he wanted to check where the question paper is leaking...

A street dog was chasing Santa and he was laughing.
A bystander: why are u laughing? Santa: I have an Airtel phone, but still Hutch network is following me.

aab news
sweater's made of pure virgin wool sir
Shopkeeper: This sweater's made of pure virgin wool sir.
Santa: You see I m not interested in the morals of the sheep.Just tell me, will it keep me warm?

Santa ki chatri me hole tha, kisine pucha, umbrella mai hole kyu?
Santa bola: Oye barish ruk jayegi to pata kaise chalega.

Jailor: Tumhe kal subah 5 baje phasi di jayegi.
Sardar: Ha Ha Ha!
Jailor: Kyon has rahe ho?
Sardar: Mai to uthta hi subha 9 baje hu!

Humor is not only fun but healthy too! Heart attack is shown to be less likely to happen for people who have an active sense of humor or who laugh much. Huge collection of funny stuff & fully sayings- Santa banta jokes, santa banta jokes in punjabi, short, new, latest santabanta jokes.

aab news
Santa Banta Jokes
Santa- kal meri shadi hai aur ladki walo ne kam log bulaye hai.
Banta- to isme prob kya hai?
Santa-pata nhi papa mujhe le jaynge ya nhi

Santa Banta Jokes


santa aur banta k bich mai fight ho rahi thi
banta:- saale mai tere kapde phaad k tujhe naanga kar doonga
santa:- dekh serious ladai mai romantic baat mat kar

SANTA:Lalaji dettol soap hai, 

Lala:ha,
santa:acha vala hai,
Lala:ha,
Santa: achi quality ka hai,
Lala:ha bhai ha,
Santa: thik hai hath dhokr 1kg aata do..

Santa: oye banta machli khayega?
Banta: nhi yaar usme kaante hote hain.
Santa: oye chadd yaar, chappal pahen ke kha lena.

Santa Ko Beta Hua. Use Jyotish Ke Pass Le Gaye
Jyotish:Ye Jiska Naam Pehle Bolega Wo mar Jyega
Baccha Bola "PAPA" Aur Dusre Din Padosi Mar Gya

Jaj : Suna hai pichale 10 saal se tmne apni biwi ko dara dhamka k rakha hai.
Santa : Par Janab
Jaj : Safai ki jarurat nahi bas itna batao ye tumne kiya kaise

aab news